Sri Lanka

Wolves in Pig’s Clothing

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Sometimes our dark side shows up in in public dressed like an ordinary thing, able to blend into the crowd, absolutely unmemorable.

I much prefer evil to reveal itself. The bland, expressionless version of it often obfuscates one’s vision, and the fight tilts to the other’s favor.

In an airport lounge in Colombo, I remember being woken up unceremoniously by a blond guy, late 30s, herding two toddlers. In a gray haze, I heard him saying loudly at me, “There are people that need these seats, you know.”

Half-awake, I scramble to sit up, thereby freeing two seats for this irascible man and his toddlers. I vaguely register people sitting near me look on, startled by his loud voice. I see his wife sitting on the floor, cradling a baby. A moment passes, and the pair begin to argue. I tune them out, thinking what bad luck to wake up to such negativity.

When my wits have fully returned, I look around and notice that three feet or so away there were maybe thirty, no, probably 40+ empty seats all around us. I didn’t need to be summarily jolted out of my sleep.

I stand up, walk over to the man with the toddlers and say to him, “Look over there. Look. Look real hard. Those are empty seats, all what, 40 of them. You didn’t have to wake me up. You’re an asshole.”

I walked away from the sight of his gaping mouth. The lounge was quiet. The wife didn’t say a word.

 

 

 

 

What Am I?

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taxi colombo

 

Touchdown: 3 July in Sri Lanka. I arrive near midnight in Colombo, and get into a Kangaroo taxi to go to my hotel. Not even 5 minutes on the road, the driver looks back at me and says:

Driver: Madam, ah… what are you?

Me: (goes into immediate existentialist crisis) Uh, um… what am I?

Driver: (smiling indulgently) I mean, you are Japanese? Malaysian? Chinese? What are you?

Me: (relieved, whew!) Oh no no no to all that. I’m Filipino.

Driver: I see, from Philippines.

Me: Yes. Don’t I look Filipino?

Driver: Look Japanese.

Me: Hhhmmmm.